The Search for Significance

It has been quite overwhelming to me that out of the fifty or so women I see each week in the Made to Crave classes, the search for significance in some form or another is the number two reason why women are in this study. The need for praise, the tendency to control, to get angry or fearful, or the desire to be and look good are all indicators that we are looking for something we think we lack. If we look closely, we will see that the focus at these times is either ourselves or our reactions to someone or something else.

I was reminded sharply of my own need this past weekend. I have been sharing this story with my classes over the past week:

Last weekend my husband and I had some company over, and the young man and my husband knew quite a few people in common. Because of this, their conversation was rapid and quite exclusive.  A few times I interjected to add some pearl of wisdom. On at least four separate occasions my husband interrupted or corrected me. It stung. It hurt. Mostly it stung and hurt because we had talked about this very thing before…

My husband happens to be a very tall man, 6’3” to be exact. I only measure in at 5’1”. Most of the time when we are standing in a circle of friends talking, he can make just a minor pivot of 30 degrees or so and unintentionally cut me out of conversation. I have a great view of his elbow, and not much else. He can also be an intense conversationalist at times, which makes me rather rude if I stand there tapping on his elbow. It looks suspiciously like I just need to gain his attention, or that I’m ready to go home. Sometimes this makes me quite ready to go home.

The Lord and I have talked about this. What bothers me about being interrupted, cut off, or cut out? Obviously, I feel insignificant when that happens. Invisible. Even though I am aware that God knows even the number of hairs on my head…I feel invisible. When I feel invisible, it can become very easy to engage in actions that I feel no one would notice anyway… a sweet treat, a game (or ten) of Yahtzee on my Kindle when I should be studying, sitting too long in front of the television. . .who really cares about these things except me?

God does. He cares about my motives and what drives me to choose something that will comfort me or allow me to escape my current situation that doesn’t involve Him. I am thankful for that, and for a God who loves me far beyond what any earthly being could. I pray that I will learn to depend upon Him more and more as each day passes.

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! [1 John 3:1]

Video: The Invisible Woman

Blessings

What do we do with our desires for things other than God when we feel God is not there for us? Is it our deepest hurts, our flesh, or is it the enemy who lies and tells us that God doesn’t love us or want what is best for us?

This world is so broken. I have many friends who have been through hell on earth and back again. Was God absent? Was He asleep? Didn’t He care?

Only God Himself can heal hearts. Only He can combat the lies that consume us. Satan is so treacherous, and he keeps us from being all that we were made to be. He diverts our attention to anything that will keep us from the Truth.

Once again, music rolls through my head, and the words to this song express the realities of these questions the best—although not better than His Holy Word. It’s just that sometimes we need a word from someone who has been through trials themselves to speak to us. Laura Story does that through her song “Blessings.” 

Laura’s husband has been through a lot. Here is an excerpt from an article on her from www.thefish959.com:

Shortly after inking the deal with INO Records in 2006, a trial entered Story’s life that would not only provide her with a deeper understanding of God’s sovereignty. After one year of marriage, Story’s husband was hospitalized with a brain tumor.

“There was a time he was on a breathing machine and we weren’t sure he was going to make it. I spent my whole life singing, ‘’Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,’ but until Jesus took me through something where my only option was to trust Him, I didn’t really know that sweetness,” reflects Story. While supporting her husband through surgery, radiation, complications, and intense physical therapy, Story composed new rubber-meets-the-road songs to reaffirm God’s presence in her darkest hours.
“It’s hard to understand why God would allow us to go through this, but I know He works all things together for good, and I feel my new album is reflecting that. Though He leads us through valleys, that’s when we get to trust Him and draw closer to Him all the more. Though I’ve doubted, His grasp has never released, never slipped. He’s remained completely faithful to me. He has proven that He really is my foundation and my hope.” 

Bless the Lord oh my soul, all that’s in me bless your name,

Forget not your power untold, not your glory or your fame

For you came to heal the broken, to redeem and make me whole, 

Bless the Lord, bless the Lord, oh my soul… 

Listen to this song here:

Laura Story, Blessings

If you have ever felt this defeat, and would like to encourage others, please leave a comment to this post. 

I love you all.

Made to Crave

Over fifty women have attended a Made to Crave class in the last week, most seeking guidance on their issues with food or something else they crave instead of God. How exciting it is to know that God is moving women to gain spiritual weight!

Our bodies and our spirits were made for God! We were created for His pleasure! What an awesome thought! Along with that thought, though, comes the realistic fact that we were not created for our own pleasure. Not that God doesn’t want us to have pleasure in our lives—He certainly does! He made every good thing that we enjoy: food, our families and friends, our work, our homes…all these He has given us for our enjoyment. It is in our flesh that we over-indulge in all these pleasures and put them above the place they were meant to have in our hearts.

We must give each and every day to the Lord. We need to get off our thrones and hand them over to the King of Kings, letting Him rule us during our day. We must stop depending on ourselves to conquer the lies and tactics of the enemy, and depend on the One who already accomplished the conquering.

“Keep your focus on Me. I have gifted you with amazing freedom, including the ability to choose the focal point of your mind. Only the crown of My creation has such remarkable capability; this is a sign of being made in My image.

Let the goal of this day be to bring every thought captive to Me. Whenever your mind wanders, lasso those thoughts and bring them into My Presence. In My radiant Light, anxious thoughts are unmasked as you bask in My unconditional Love. Confused ideas are untangled while you rest in the simplicity of My Peace. I will guard you and keep you in constant Peace, as you focus your mind on Me."*

You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor. [Psalm 8:5]*

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. [2 Corinthians 10:5]*



*Sarah Young, Jesus Calling (January 29), ©2004

Sarah Groves, The Word (Conversations, 2001)

Catching Up

It has been so long since I posted to my blog. I have been all-consumed with my daughter’s wedding, and I must say, I had no idea how deflated I would feel when it was all over.

So many people have asked me about the wedding, so I thought in the tradition of journaling or blogging I should get some thoughts down before they slip away forever. After all…it has been over a month since the big event!

So much adrenaline and so much planning goes into such an occasion. At least it did for me. The ultimate desire is that when it is time for the wedding everything will go smoothly and there will be no more frantic rushing to finish something left undone. I was so thankful for all the help I had to make sure that this was the case.

Jeremy, the groom, being a music major and seminary graduate in worship studies, concentrated solely on making the ceremony concentrated on Christ. There were many comments to me about the beauty of the ceremony, Kevin Hass’s wonderful message from Ephesians 5, and the musicians. It was truly a worship experience, as many have commented. One good friend even told me it inspired her to have her vows renewed, as she was not married in the church, and has since come to the Lord.

Near the end of the reception, one of Jeremy’s older relatives came to me to thank me for making her feel at home. She told me she was Jewish, but that she loved the ceremony, and that Amazing Grace was one of the most beautiful songs ever written, no matter what religion you were. She put extra icing on the wedding cake for me that day.

The help my dear friends and family gave me to get everything set up and taken down meant so much to me. It is so hard for me to ask for help to do anything, and these dear people helped us with such joy. I could never thank them enough.

I realize that I have suspended my study on Covenants. Yes, I am on to something new. I will be doing quite a bit of teaching in the coming months. In February, I went to a conference to hear Lysa TerKeurst, President of Proverbs 31 Ministries, speak in Williamsburg. She had just published a book: Made to Crave: Satisfying Your Deepest Desires With God, Not Food. This book has actually taken me further on a continued journey of a desire to be a better steward of my body and soul. In June, I will begin teaching at my church during the Sunday Bible Study hour, using this book and DVD series as a tool, sharing my own experiences with addictions, and what I have learned and am learning about victory over the lies of the enemy. In addition, I will be teaching at the church where I work this summer for their ladies summer Bible studies, beginning June 28 and ending the first week in August.

From this time until then, my Fill-r-Up blog will be devoted to discussions regarding this subject. I am very excited about sharing my life with people who are interested, the good and bad of it, and how God is working in me. “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you [me] will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” (Phil. 1:6)